Ainsley Hayes

[Sam talking confidently about 40% of the teachers in Kirkwood, Oregon not having enough textbooks, and the Republican education bill offering no money for textbooks. . . .]

"Ainsley Hayes, is that true?" -- Moderator
"No, it's not." -- Ainsley
"Is Sam Seaborn lying? -- Moderator

"Lying's an awfully strong word. . . yes, he's lying. And we should tell the truth about education. The bill contained plenty of money for new textbooks -- also, computer literacy, school safety, physical plant. The difference is we wanted to give the money directly to communities, and let them decide how best to spend it... on the off chance that the needs of Lincoln High in Dayton are different than the needs of Crenshaw High in South Central L.A."

"Sam, why did the President veto the bill?" -- Moderator

[Sam tries to get a word in edgewise, but Ainsley cuts him off.]

"Because it guaranteed by law that 95% of the money go directly into the classroom and bypass the pork barrel buffet, which is troubling to this President because he doesn't work for the students, and he doesn't work for the parents of the students -- he works for the teachers' union."

[Sam again tries to break in but can't.]

"The bill contained plenty of money for textbooks, Mark, and anyone who says otherwise is flat-out lying. And we should tell the truth about this... textbooks are important, if for no other reason than they accurately place the town of Kirkwood in California and not in Oregon."

"Please oh please, let them not be watching." -- Sam murmurs as they go to a commercial break.

Meanwhile back at the White house, Josh rushes into Toby's office saying:
"Toby, come quick -- Sam's getting his ass kicked by a girl!"

"Ginger, get the popcorn. . ." Toby says to his assistant as he follows Josh to a television.

JOSH
You're not taking the job?

AINSLEY
No. But thank you for talking to me, instead of about me.

JOSH
Hey, I'm still back on he offered you the job... but you're not taking the job?

SAM
No, man, why participate in the process when you can get a job commenting on it?

AINSLEY
You think because I don't want to work here it's because I can get a better gig on
Geraldo? Gosh, let's see if there could possibly be any other reason why I wouldn't want
to work in this White House? This White House that feels that government is better for
children than parents are. That looks at forty years of degrading and humiliating free
lunches handed out in a spectacularly failed effort to level the playing field and says,
'Let's try forty more.' This White House that says of anyone that points that out to
them, that they are cold and mean and racist, and then accuses Republicans of using the
politics of fear. This White House that loves the Bill of Rights, all of them - except
the second one.

SAM
[looks at Josh nervously] This is the wrong place to talk about guns right now. I thought
your column was idiotic.

AINSLEY
Imagine my surprise.

SAM
[getting steadily more emotional] But for a brilliant surgical team and two centimeters
of a miracle, this guy's dead right now. From bullets fired from a gun bought legally.
They bought guns, they loaded them, they drove from Wheeling to Rosslyn, and until they
pulled the trigger they had yet to commit a crime. I am so off-the-charts tired of the
gun lobby tossing around words like 'personal freedom' and no one calling 'em on it.
[Josh moves away uncomfortably.] It's not about personal freedom, and it certainly has
nothing to do with public safety. It's just that some people like guns.

AINSLEY
Yes, they do. But you know what's more insidious than that? Your gun control position
doesn't have anything to do with public safety, and it's certainly not about personal
freedom. It's about you don't like people who do like guns. You don't like the people.
Think about that, the next time you make a joke about the South.